Shake n Stomp

Perhaps it's just because of my earthquake encounter, the repeated viewings of Mad Max 2 or the studying of urban crisis and famine, but recently I've been thinking about my future and what it might entail. And it's become clearer and clearer that can only be one thing - absolute destruction of all civilization as we know it.

Whether it's chemical or viral created zombies, nuclear holocaust, uncontrollable mutating flu, astoroid impact, volcanic erruption, gasoline fueled war or simply moral breakdown due to video games like Halo 3 - one thing is for certain: Armageddon is just arround the corner. I for one plan to be prepared.

Some simple lessons I learnt from my time in the Madagascan bush with the village people (aproximatel three or four hours) taught me a lot about survival. But most of my practical lessons have come from B movies, which offer a wealth of information on possible scenarios for the extinction of mankind. Newer films such as "The Day After Tomorrow" or "I am Legend" aren't worth watching. Their flashy bugets have made them forget what is really important about surviving in a wasteland of a world: Leather, classic cars, improvised weapons and a bad ass attitude. These are the things that will get you through.

So my first point was to find suitable apparel. A bandana was a must, the keep the hair back (barbers will be the first to go) then sunglasses, because everywhere will be bunring desert and wasteland - or some other similar terrain suitable for filming low budget movies and looking desolate. The boots are a must - walking around on the remains of civilization is going to need hard footware - there might be like broken glass and stuff. Denim and leather finish things off nicely. If it makes you think of classic rock it's probably the right thing. Which reminds me, there's gonna need to be a playlist for while I'm driving around in my customised car (I'm thinking scythes on the wheels, some chains for hanging onto during a fight on moving vehicle and other spikey stuff).



I don't really need to worry about making friends. I'm better off starting as a loner and picking a few up along the way. But I will need a sawn off shotgun, or some kind of boomerang. Ammunition may be scarce after a while so it might be worth learning hand to hand. Training with all kinds of barbarian type weapons seems like a good idea, especially if I end up in some kind of gladatorial arena fighting for my life (people in post-apocalyptic worlds have violent tastes in entertainment).

Anyway, I better be going to fill up all available containers with gasoline and watch those cut scenes in Terminator where Michael Biehn is fighting cyborgs in the future. Once shit starts going down I'll keep updating this as long as possible - until the servers go down. After that, if you can make your way to Oxford look for the scrap metal fort and ask for the Plenipotentiary, if you're lucky and you've bought me tributes I might just let you join humities last outpost against the marauding gangs. Until then, good luck.